Despite the fact that many people live lives which are completely different to each other we all seem convinced that we are on track and living according to our values, desires and life goals. But do we stop and question our life values enough to take a different path or have we become too heavily invested in the choices we made years ago which are now defining our lives?
The problem is that we travel down career paths which we considered meaningful and right for us. But sometimes we get stuck. Our lives get so wrapped up in the lifestyle we have built around the choices we made years ago that we can forget that we still have a choice. We become accustomed to a way of life, used to our income levels and accept the reality of our lives without questioning it.
How often is our job, lifestyle and income caught up with how we feel about ourselves? How much does our self image control the outcome of our lives and what we think we deserve determine it?
There is an interesting idea mentioned by Jay Kubassek during the SFM course training which is that “You can’t grow beyond your self image”. This struck me as very true. It is how we feel about ourselves which determines our life choices and ultimately our destinations. If we are ‘stuck’ with a negative self image it is very difficult to grow a successful life out of this unless you first change it. Even with the grandest vision of your life if you don’t believe you are worth it you will self sabotage and create reasons and ways to undermine you own success.
But why would we do this to ourselves?
There is a secret payoff to maintaining the ‘status quo’ and consistent world view which you continually project on to others and yourself. It is the story you are continually telling yourself and everyone else. You can maintain the reality of who you think you are – your self image. How can you be ‘super successful’ while also keeping up a self image of a hard done by and impoverished person? Or maybe your view of a successful person is that of a ‘greedy self serving individual’ with whom you can’t relate. If your lifestyle suddenly changed you may have nothing in common anymore with the people who mean the most to you. There are many reasons why you might sabotage your best ‘conscious’ efforts to ‘succeed’ but one of the most important ones is to maintain your self image. Who we think we are in the world is an important part of our perception of the world. Our peer group and who we are most close to re-enforce our belief systems and make us feel more secure about who we think we are.
Choose your friends wisely!
Are you surrounded with people who want to see you succeed? Or do they secretly or openly sabotage your best efforts to make a better life for yourself? If we are constantly double guessing our own efforts for a ‘better’ life, in place of our friends/relatives beliefs then we won’t have the required motivation and momentum to create a life of our conscious choosing.
Change starts from within.
So how do we go about changing and moving towards what we want and away from what we don’t want? Knowing what you want is the hard part. Once you get clear on knowing what you want you can focus on it regularly and take steps to move your life towards it. Take your focus away from those things which cause you anxiety and pain. We are often so habitually focused on the very things which make us unhappy that we continually create them by giving them our energy.
If you are looking for a change in career path the SFM offer a community of like minded individuals who are building their own internet based businesses, escaping the 9 to 5 and leveraging their income with the power of the internet. Join their free 7 day bootcamp video series to learn more.